First of all, we do work together. Yet you hardly ever talk to me in the work place. Granted, we don't work on the same line, but our lockers are in the same row, and some days you don't even acknowledge my presence. When we do talk, it's hardly ever more than mindless small talk, like any other co-workers would engage in.
Secondly, you rarely, if ever, text me or message me outside of work. I can't even remember the last time we hung out in a group, let alone together. Oh that's right, you used me for a ride to IKEA. You bought me lunch, yes, and that was nice, but how about inviting me over? Nope. You always say "we should get together soon", but our interaction never goes beyond that. Hell, you don't even comment on anything of mine on Facebook.
Yes, it's true that at one time you and I were very good, very close friends. Dare I even say you were my best friend. In fact, you are the reason my husband and I are together now and having a baby. But you were always the centre of drama, and when I grew tired of that, it came to my attention that you have been talking shit about me behind my back. That's when I cut ties with you for good. But about a year later, I started working with you, and although I tried at first, things have never been able to go back to the way they were. You always elude that you want to go back to that time, but never make the effort. I gave up a long time ago. I just appreciate the fact that we can be civil and even friendly, but I won't waste my energy chasing you.
In the end, the only reason why you want to take charge of my baby shower is because you have always been the "event planner". You want your name to be associated with any event or gathering, you want to be the one who makes that Facebook event page. Yes, a baby shower is supposed to be about the mother, but it's still a party, so why can't you get all the credit, right? I mean, the shower would still be held at my house, which I would have to clean by myself (since you didn't end up helping me before the surprise birthday party for your boyfriend that we had here in the summer), and I would be the one spending the money on food and drinks and whatever else is typical of a baby shower. But you would get the credit, and that's all that matters.
So I spent the last couple weeks trying to think of a nice way to let you know "thanks but no thanks", and I couldn't come up with anything because sometimes I can be just too nice. I don't want to offend anyone. But today, you made it very clear that you haven't changed a bit, when it was discovered that you were now making fun of my husband. A person whom you have known for more than 10 years, much much longer than me. It was not kosher. He was far more upset by it than I was, I suppose I was just unsurprised. But it gave me the incentive to finally tell you that I don't want you planning my shower. And how do you react? Like this:
(Actual MSN conversation)
don't worry about the baby shower, i don't need you to set it up.
Lemme guess, to awkward for me to do something nice for you?
well basically. in all honesty, we aren't exactly friends anymore... we're acquaintances at best... it just doesn't make sense for you to do it. i do very much appreciate the offer, but i don't want you to do it.
Wow, ok cool .... Have a good life ...... ;) good to know my "friend" doesn't consider me a friend .......
("Friend" goes offline)
I don't even know how to react to that. It just oozes with grace and maturity. I'm sorry I took away the opportunity for you to be in the spotlight. I'm sorry I was being honest. I'm sorry you are in denial about exactly what kind of relationship we have.
But honestly, I'm not sorry at all.